Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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