No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Randomize
