i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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