Dude my mom stole all your condoms
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
