I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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