Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Randomize
