She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
