I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
