Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
