I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
