Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
