I wannas sexs uuuuu
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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