You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
