Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
