I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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