pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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