when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I didn't shave. On purpose
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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