i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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