i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
We had sex on a dog bed..
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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