We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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