I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
