We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
