I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
you win again, gameday.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
