Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
