i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
