Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
