apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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