I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
