38 yer olds are good kisserssss
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
I woke up under a house in Key West
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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