doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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