you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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