I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
What drink are we having for lunch?
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
i think im in europe. pls send help
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize