Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
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