Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Randomize
