That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
