benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
how drunk are you?
Several
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
