I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
