He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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