i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize