Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize