R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
