I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize