with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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