This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
