i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
