sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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