just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
