We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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