Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
