That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
