All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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